It’s Thursday again! It has been a tough week. I woke up on Saturday with a scratchy throat and no voice…Sunday was the same….Monday I felt like absolute garbage…Tuesday I felt better because I went to bed at 7:00pm Monday night…Wednesday I bought and took some Mucinex MAX…and today…the meds are still going but I feel more like myself. I went for a run. The first time since last Tuesday I’ve run and last Wednesday was the last time I went to the gym…
It is 7:08pm…it would be nice to be in bed but it’s not vital to my survival like it was on Monday. Instead, this is my set up:
I’m knitting on a white baby hat…it’s a baby size, not a newborn. Their heads don’t stay that small for that long. One of my favorite people has just found out that a tiny human is growing inside and it will be a bit of time before we all find out boy or girl…so I’m knitting a white hat. Plus it will look timeless.
Also there is beer. This is the first time since Sunday I’ve felt good enough to drink beer. that is so sad. Beer is one of my favorite beverages…its on the list of 5 things I drink: coffee, water, tea, beer, sparkling water…sometimes rootbeer in a rootbeer float or perhaps a gin & tonic…but mostly beer if I’m feeling like alcohol. And it’s basically water-beer tonight. But it’s a beer. That’s a step.
School is drawing to a close. Just tomorrow. And 2 more weeks. We need summer. This group of girls I have…it’s like tiptoeing through a mine field! One sideways glance or a gentle scolding for not meeting expectations and suddenly “The teacher HATES me” and “The teacher is SO MAD at me!” I will tell you one thing, it takes a hell of a lot more than what these kids are doing to make me “hate” a person…and for that matter a whole lot more for me to be “mad.” I need to remember…middle school hormones are the worst! Try not to take it personally…but I don’t like being perceived in a way that I don’t mean to be.
Just like here. I want to be real. My life is not all rosy but it isn’t all bad either. I’m by no means living a life without. I’m very grateful. I need to do more to give back.
Sidenote. I’ve been racking my brain trying to come across the instance when I could have portrayed that I “hated” and was “so mad” at this one student…but then I realize I’m sifting through HUNDREDS of interactions I’ve had today with kids!!!!! My day started by taking attendance and greeting students and asking them to get ready and be quiet for the prayer and sending students to the office to turn things in…this just happened between 7:45 and 8:00!!! Then we had mass…then I had a 7th grade math class where I interacted with at least 28 students…then I went to the computer lab to help with a Kindergarten tech class with 28 more kids that I only see once a week…then back for planning period, thank the Lord…then back for more Kindergarten tech with 27 kids I only see once a week…then to 8th grade math with 15 kids…then lunch, finally…then 6th grade math with 14 kids…and 6th grade math with 9 kids…and then finally homeroom with my 21…
In between that I am in the hall, talking with students and teachers…popping into other classrooms…without all of that 163 students have passed before me. I’ve probably spoken directly to most of the kindergarteners at least 4 or 5 times…this generation of littles struggles with using a mouse…couple that with the fact that they are just learning to read, there is a lot of questions!!! My brain is fried! I can’t even begin to think of when I would have said anything to a student to make them feel upset.
But somehow I have. I even talked with the parent and she couldn’t give me specifics. I’m hoping its just pre-teen angst. But I don’t like that I’m at the end of it. I’m hoping to fix it tomorrow. I’ll probably come off like a huge dork.
Best job in the world. Hardest one I’ve had 🙂
I’m going to knit on that hat. That baby is growing!!